The most surprising thing about Tom Carroll's book wasn't that it got published, but that he wrote it all. He did so in the full knowledge that, once his name was out there, he'd be Googled to distraction, every aspect of his online life and reputation perused, critiqued, and judged to the point where anonymity would be little more than a desperate, feverish dream. Moreover, as intimate observation turned into both positive and negative commentary, the material weight of his Internet-based existence increased exponentially.
"Tom Carroll needs to man up," said RackShark52. "The guy wrote a self help guide for nerds who stumble across porn featuring their ex-girlfriends. How many levels of LOSER can there be?"
Drowning in exposure, and with the certainty that, however temporary these consequences might seem, there could be absolutely no guarantee of the coverage ever waning (because once it's out, it's out forever, and can be rediscovered - and added to - again and again), his regret finally transcended the personal, and turned outward, encompassing those whom he may have inadvertently injured or subjected to tangential scrutiny.
Voicemail message: "Hi, this is Hannah. God knows where I am, but my 'phone's off, so leave a message. Unless you're Tom Carroll, in which case you can go fuck yourself."
Auto-reply out-of-office e-mail response: "Susan Dalton is currently on sabbatical. Please forward all relevant work-related correspondence to jfaversham@connexharbour.net"
"Carroll's work is important," said Dr. Laura Hampton, "Because, regardless of its original motivation, it addresses some aspects of modern human psychosexual relationships which seldom garner much attention beyond a frequently superficial discussion of porn addiction and identity."
"I wouldn't do that to an ex. Whatever she's done, she don't deserve that," said Slippperee5. "So who's the dude in the videos?" asked NunChux, in reply to Slippperee5, "I'm guessing he's gotta be better equipped than TC."
"What I don't get," said BeaverBroXXX, "Is why he don't just hook up with one of the thousands of girls chasing his ass all over the net now. Man, he got FANS big time."
"One element of the case which has hitherto been overlooked by commentators is the presumed certainty with which Carroll has successfully identified the person he saw in the videos as his ex-girlfriend. If it's an example of mistaken identity, then much of the approbrium is misplaced," said Dr. Ian Hamilton-Fuller, "And if Carroll has erred here, it's hard not to see everyone involved emerging with quite a lot of egg on their faces."
"Cue the Tweets making gags about something other than egg covering faces [Link to Dr. Ian Hamilton-Fuller's blog entry]," Tweeted NihilistBob.
After three weeks of intense, if contextually-guarded, mainstream media attention, Tom Carroll's book slipped to twenty eighth place on the New York Times bestseller list. Online debate and speculation continue.
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events
and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or
used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living
or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental. (With thanks to Megan Cashman.)
